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Wednesday, November 30, 2011

My Broken Heart, Mended


My mother told my daughter that we should listen to Hundred More Years by Francesca Battistelli, so we did with the new cd my mom picked up for Lyshie.  


The first part of the song is the way I feel about my Matt.  


"The future looks so beautiful and bright 
They can dance under the moonlight 
'Cause God is smiling down on them tonight
And she wants to stay right here
Make it last for a hundred more years"

Oh the memories of those first couple years before we got married and then afterwards.  
My knight protector
My comforter
My beloved...

The song goes on to talk about their baby girl and how she'll grow up, leave home...


STOP!
Wait a Moment!

My goal is to raise my children in the admonition of the Lord and to raise them
to be a good spouse to their future spouse if that's where God leads them.
All this time, all this love, all this work
and in a few years, she may be gone.
The bulk of her love will transfer from me to him, her future spouse
the one we've prayed for.


(borrowed pix)


(borrowed pix)

My heart ached,
tears welled up, 
I couldn't stop myself from crying
and I am already missing her.

While trying to simplify my life a bit in general
I was reading a bit more out of the book
Plain Wisdom by Cindy Woodsmall and Miriam Flaud.
What a precious gift I was given when reading the words 
in those pages tonight.

"My fingers ached with cold by the time
by the time I hung up the last shirt, 
grabbed the clothesbasket, and trudged inside.
As I stood by the wood-burning cookstove, 
warming my hands, 
I looked out the window and across the field.
In the distance I saw a white shirt hanging on a neighbor's clothesline, 
and it reminded me that my son's shirt wasn't missing.
It was simply on someone else's clothesline - 
his wife's.
All his hopes for his future and his family's future
hung in the same crisp November air.

I had not lost a son.
His life was no longer under my roof, 
but it is in the same place I'd put it
when he was born:
in the hands of God."

(borrowed pix)
What good it did my soul to read that.  
Praising God for the time I do have
with my precious daughter (and children).

My prayers for her will continue
so will those for her future spouse
my love for her will never cease
and I will enjoy the time I do have with her
right here, right now.


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